Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Harder Right? or Easier Wrong

The day is done. Good times. Sometimes you've just done all you can do. So I find myself at the computer before I retire to watch an hour of TiVo'd stupidness, and don't have any perils of wisdom today.

Harder Right or Easier Wrong?
So the Company I work for has a Company Constitution. I suppose most companies do. But this is one of the Code of Ethics... that the Company's professionals will choose the harder right over the easier wrong.

Now when one is 22 when they go to work for a Company this makes perfect sense. Eight (almost nine years later) I still ask myself this question when I find myself questioned by what is the right thing to do? Admit that it's not done and I don't know when the deal will be signed? or dodge the call? Call someone as soon as I receive bad news & receive verbal lashing or sit on it? Now this seems like common sense I realize. Our parents teach us right and wrong, but I would venture to say we ask ourselves this question at some point during our day fairly often. I type this random thought (see title of blog) and trust me- I ain't a saint (note to self :don't invite English teaching brother to read Blog) I don't always get it right...

I've found being a parent and now being a parent of an extremely strong willed and energetic toddler- I ask myself this question more often than usual outside of my office.

Mom's Little Spit Fire
For example tonite, I couldn't seem to do anything right to please my little guy. Dinner was all wrong. He's trying so hard to use utensils that sometimes he just gets P-E-A-V-ED if he can't load said fork or spoon. And suddenly it's all my fault. My little man is uber independent- he can do it all by himself. Mom is so yesterday. He didn't eat much and instead of beating myself up trying to get something down the kid- I've subscribed to "If he's hungry he'll eat..."

"Cole lets read a book." That always gets a head turn. "B-O-A-P" he confirms. "Book" I say. We're off to find just the right b-o-a-p in his room. Tonite it's "Bad Dog Marley" I ask if he would like me to read it to him.. "Yes he says...but I already know the ground rules. He must turn the pages. I think we've got the routine confirmed and suddenly we're having a toddler meltdown. Apparently- I didn't get the memo tonite. I'm not suppose to read the book and let him turn the pages. He's going to read it to me in jibberish AND turn the pages... but the rules changed again and suddenly to book is chucked on the ground defiantly.... and here's the moment...
harder right or easier wrong. I actually had to think about it. Man it would be easier to give him the book or make it all better... but the book chucking was just all kinds of wrong.

There the little demon stood. Staring me down "whatcha gonna do about it..." and there I sat staring him down like "no you didn't" " No Cole.. No throw!!! " I picked up Bad Dog Marley.. said "Cole we don't treat our things that way.." and walked away. Ignoring my little spit fire sets him off quicker than anything...

Save the Drama for your Mama
Cole throws himself on the ground... and begins throwing his tantrum. And when he realizes that it's gotten no reaction he usually picks himself up off the ground and sniveling (for effect) follows me... "Ma.." ..." Ma..." "Ma..." Kiddo I invented the temper tantrum. I know the rules. Just wait. One day when you're older- I'll do as your Nana did and throw a cup of water on you for that crap (is what I'm saying in my head)

"Are you done?" I ask. He shakes his head up and down. "What you did was wrong.." Another head shake.. "Are you sorry?" "Yes" he says

We're on to chase now, and after we've exhausted TOGO the dog it's time for bath and prayers and bed... and as I carry him to bed and say "Nite nite - love you- I'll be here when you wake up.." He stands up in his crib and says "Ma.." ... "Yes Cole?" and he reaches his arms up to give me another hug. All is right with my world.

And I remind myself again maybe I don't win every battle of toddler parenting or future parenting or being a working mom..but I might just win the war.

Jesus on Speed Dial
So on a grown up level- Today was a rough day. Not a banner day. A day you manage to make it through as you muddle through life events. Jesus was on speed dial today. In the car. At the office. In my head. And he answered in every way because I made it thru this day.. and maybe found a little peace along the way. A quote I love "But patience is when God-or something-makes the now a little roomier"

Maybe I'm learning something in my walk after all.

AND FOR THE BIG FINALE... I parted with my old laptop at work HP Puter I (RIP)... I made it thru IT re-imaging (all files were recovered) and have a new buddy. I so deem him HP Puter II. I'll call him Pute. This afternoon he was puting fabulously. I'll keep you posted as to how our relationship progresses. I had to let him spend his first nite at the office.. he's still working on his Image..